The Smell That Got Me, excerpts from book…

October 16, 2008 at 12:52 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , )

I don’t remember my mother ever talking to us about sex or should I say to me about sex.  I think she had conversations with my brother because it just felt easier for her to do.  No mother ever wants to imagine her daughter opening up her legs and giving her gift away, so maybe that is why she never even brought it up.  Come to think of it, I don’t even remember my mom having a visible lover, except for when I was about four years old.  His name was Michael and boy was my mom in love with him.  I was too young too see the relationship that my mom and dad had together.  She told me that after she found out she was pregnant with me they separated. Michael was very handsome.  We went everywhere with him.  He was family.  I sometimes forgot that he wasn’t my dad, especially some mornings when I would bust into my mom’s room, only to find them both laying in bed.  The room was funky.  It reminded me of macaroni and cheese, you know the kind with the bread crumbs on top that is slightly burned?  I didn’t know what the smell was.  It never dawned on me until this very moment as I write this, but now looking back, I feel like I have a sense of ownership with the smell.  See, as I got older I realize that I was chasing down this scent.  It became a part of who I am.  It was the smell of sex.

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